In the immortal words of Phineas and Ferb: There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation. And if you’re a parent, those days can be….a lot. Especially when your child has special needs and thrives on routine.
Based on my experience as a gaddy of two teenagers and work as an Education Advocate in the state of Michigan, here’s how to understand what resources are available for your child and how to make summer smoother, more structured, and even fun- for everyone.
Ease Into the Transition
Kids with special needs often rely on predictability. A sudden switch to summer’s unstructured days can be stressful. Talk early about the change, preview activities, and co-create a simple summer schedule or bucket list to help with buy-in.
Explore School Based Support
If your child has an Individualized Education Program, IEP, you may be eligible for Extended School Year, ESY, services. ESY helps prevent regression over the summer and maintain key skills. Some districts are very hard to convince that your child actually needs this service, but ultimately, it’s an IEP team decision. If your child is in an IEP you have the right to call for a meeting at any point to discuss support.
In my role as an Education Advocate, I see queer families can be more reluctant than others to engage in and request resources because we don’t want to ‘rock the boat’ or stick out. I’m here to tell you to rock that boat! Be vocal about your family needs and engage stakeholders to discuss available resources.
Consider Summer Programs
Some districts now offer rebranded summer options—think learning academies, enrichment camps, or skill-building workshops. These can benefit both general and special education students, but space fills fast. It’s best to have this conversation with your child’s teacher or team NOW. It’s also good to know how long this program will last over the summer, as the districts are eager to get the buildings closed down and cleaned up for fall. Plus, those teachers need a break too!
Tap Into Your Community
Start with your local library. Libraries are a great resource for programming and camps in your area. Don’t be shy, go in and ask for help. Librarians and library staff are great people and are in this work to help the community.
Keep Structure
Routine is important, and for children with special needs, it may be important to keep the same bedtime/wake up time over the summer to maintain not only sanity, but medication schedules and meals as well. Creating a visual schedule that your child can understand and have a hand in creating (check out Pinterest for inspiration!) will not only keep the question of “what are we doing today?” down to minimum but will also keep YOU on schedule as well. But with that said, it’s also okay to do nothing. Planned down time is a good thing for EVERYONE!
Look into Camps
Summer camps are another great option. I am in Michigan because I came up to work at a YMCA camp in their summer and Outdoor Education Program and never went back! Aside from the traditional summer camps, there are also athletic camps, art/drama/music camps, STEM/STEAM focused camps, and adventure/hiking/horse camps for the older kids.
It’s imperative that the family do their research to make sure that the camp is ready to handle what your child’s need may be related to their disability. On a personal note, our son has been going to a camp for teens with special needs for the past three summers. The very first time we went, he was yelling in the car all the way there “I DON’T WANT TO GO!” When we picked him up, he was yelling in the car all the way home “I WANT TO GO BACK!” A camper was born!
Make Your Own Magic
When all else fails, Gaddies are very resourceful and can create their own summer magic! There are countless Pinterest Boards with summer backyard ideas for all age groups. When you’re at your library, ask the librarian for help in finding just the right book for your family and what you want to do.
Self Care is Important!
But whatever you do, please take time for yourself and your partner. If you’re doing this solo, this is even MORE important! Parenting a child with special needs can seem like a full time job, even during the school year. Gaddies need grown-up time too. A night out to have a dinner that doesn’t involve a sippy cup or chicken nuggets, or going to see a movie that isn’t rated G can be just as much fun as a week on the beach.
Got questions for The Gadvocate or want to share what’s worked for your family?
Email us anytime at thegadvocate@heygaddies.com.
And whatever your summer looks like: have fun, make memories—and don’t forget the sunblock. ☀️
About The Author
Tom McMillen-Oakley is an Education Advocate in Michigan. In his role as an Education Advocate he is responsible for working with the school and student’s learning team to ensure students are getting an education that meets them where they are. He also works with students who have been removed for discipline reasons and works to get them back into an educational setting in a safe and accommodating way.
He is a retired Professor, author, artist husband and proud gaddy of two children. He and his husband Tod are also gaddies to two fur babies, Eddie, a surly Maine Coon, and Roxie, a 150 lb fur ball of a St. Bernard. He and Tod can often be found sitting on their couch or hanging out by the pool. Tom is the author of “Jesus has Two Daddies” which chronicles their adoption journey. You can find the book here.
Disclaimer:
Please note that this blog was created by Tom McMillen-Oakley in his personal capacity. The opinions expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not reflect the views of the quoted or referenced sites and or organizations.
